LOL, lard is wonderful in soap. Go look on almost any soap at the store and you'll see sodium tallowate as an ingredient. That is soponified tallow, beef lard if you will. Most people use soap with animal fats and don't even know it. Lard can be bought at the grocery store. At the walmart near me, the lard is in the same aisle as the liquid oils, just on the bottom shelf. They have a couple of brands, I go for the one in the green bucket but I've tried the armour brand and it works fine also. In the grocery store nearest me, the lard is stacked on the back of the meat case in the meat department. They only sell armour brand. Crisco can also be used but I can't remember what you use in the soap calc for crisco.